Sometimes, when I go to a new place, I think about what kind of person I’d like to be. I dream of combining all the good values in people I know and try to plant them within myself. It never worked that well before sebab bukan senang nak berubah but I still have high hopes on myself. You see, I’ve always had this thought, “new place, new person”. I know the “be yourself” thing but kadang-kadang being yourself tu boleh tak kena dengan surroundings. I mean, what if you’re doing a formal presentation in front of your colleagues, would you show off your goofy personality? Nuh-uh. Everyone has got plenty of different sides of themselves so ikut masa and surroundings la mana satu attitude yang sesuai to tunjukkan.
I have thousands of shades of me. I show different sides of myself to different people. Yes, it’s true that you have to be yourself but kalau you see something in someone yang you admire or look up to, why not try to become more like them in that aspect? Kalau ikut logic pun, takkan lah masa umur 25, you want to think and act exactly the same way you did when you were fifteen. Where’s the growth in that?
Living in TGB for 2 years have taught me so much. I look up to so many people there sebab they're like idols to me. For instance, I’ve seen a classmate of mine trying to pick up a duster yang jatuh from the whiteboard that's far from him a few times. Sometimes, he picked it up on time before the teacher got the chance to bend down and sometimes he didn’t. Even if he didn’t get to pick anything up off the floor pun, his actions were noticeable enough for me to appreciate what he did padahal “angkat barang kat lantai je pun”. I think he was being nice but I also feel that he just has good manners. Even smiling and beri salam to people you meet is good. Tolong people study, bagi pinjam barang, being nice and friendly etc. We humans have this weird way of
thinking too much of ourselves and our ego, or some might call it “segan”, we miss out on the adventures we could've had if only we smiled back that one time.
The idea of doing good deeds to be noticed by other people should never cross our minds. Benda baik yang kita buat should always be founded by all the right niat; for pahala, for bekalan kita nanti. For Allah azza wa jalla.
Sebab it comes down to the question :
Kita hidup kat dunia nak impress kan the creations of our Creator ke The Creator Himself?
I am such a long way from where my friends and all you non-existential readers are but I do know this, it wouldn’t hurt your ego to just say hello first to a couple of strangers (especially if they will be your coursemates for 5 years). ‘Cause if you don’t, you might just come home feeling a sense of regret.
Believe me, I know I did.
